One of the reasons why I think Brittany and I make such a good team is that we balance each other out. Another example of that is in our respective family sizes. Here’s Brittany for more-
As you know, Candace recently shared her thoughts on kids and being one and done. She only has one child, and provided what she see as the pros and cons of this family unit size. Now, I’m going to share my thoughts (if I can stay focused long enough) on having more than one kid, like I do.
Between my husband and I, we have five children in total. I have two and he has one from previous relationships, and we have two together. His oldest daughter is 17. My older boys are 13 and 12, and our two youngest are 4 and 3.
Wow. That’s a lot of arguing. A lot of complaining. A lot of eating, back talk and messes. The older kids aren’t with us all of the time. They spend a lot time with other family and friends, but still.
I had my kids in pairs. My first two boys are 16 months apart. Then, seven years later, I had my third and fourth. They are about 13 months apart. (We didn’t waste any time huh?) None were planned. They were all huge surprises, but we made it work. Now, we are right smack in the middle of every age group except newborn. We have a little bit of teen, preteen, and a whole lot of toddler. Candace had some awesome pros and cons for having one child. Here are my pros and cons on having multiples.
The biggest thing I love about having more than one is they always have someone. As Candace said, with one child, mom and dad are their sole entertainment at home. With siblings, especially close in age, they always have a friend to play with. They entertain each other for hours playing together. It’s almost like having a best friend around. They share secrets and come up with stunts to get mom and dad. A sibling bond is an awesome thing to witness.
Another amazing positive that comes from having more than one kid is how much they can teach each other. The younger siblings pick up so much and so quickly from the older ones. My daughter isn’t even in preschool yet and she knows everything my son does, and he’s in his second year of preschool. It seems like it is easier for them to learn from their siblings than it is when I try to teach them.
They also always have someone watching out for them. Since my kids are so close in age, most of the time they are in the same school at the same time. So, if one of them is getting picked on or bullied, they always know that big/little brother is there to stand up for them if needed. And sometimes, one will pass on information to us that the other one was afraid or embarrassed to tell.
Having more than one child means I have more helpers! And I don’t mean the air quote kind of help, like 3-year-old “helping” with dinner or the 4-year-old “helping” daddy work. I actually do get a little a real-life help from the little ones every now and then. My youngest two will help with the laundry, put toys away, pick up their room, and occasionally try to run the vacuum.
A lot of help come from the big ones. If we go out somewhere, I have more eyes and hands to make sure the little ones don’t get us thrown out for being crazy or breaking something. I have a babysitter or an unpaid Uber from time to time. (Only from the oldest one that can actually drive). Loading the dishwasher, cleaning windows, holding a hand. There is always something they can help with.
Now onto the not so fun, cute, sweet stuff.
Oh, my word! You would not believe the amount of stuff I clean up on a daily basis. It’s insane. From playdough and paint, to dishes, laundry and dirty shoes, I’m always cleaning something. And yea I have helpers, like I said before, but some stuff they just can’t do like mom does.
Yep, just like Candace says is her pro of only having one, sibling fights are insane, and my con of having many. One argument between siblings can last for days. The little ones fight over everything. Even if they have two of the exact same thing, they fight over one or both of them.
The older kids can get a little rough. It goes from a little playing around one minute, to something from a WWE pay per view that I can only imagine the neighbors are placing bets on, the next.
Kids run up a HUGE bill. One is absolutely expensive. Food, drinks, clothes and shoes that they can only wear for a month, toys, education, backpacks, school supplies, celebrations. I could probably go on for days and days. And when you have more than one, go ahead and multiply all of that out.
This one kinda breaks my heart. I love all my kids equally, and I try to make it a point that they know. But there is always some kind of rivalry. Who’s getting better grades, who is better at sports, who spends the most time with mom, who does Dad see the most. It’s always something.
No matter if you have one or twenty, family is family. You are gonna love them, care for them, cry with them, and even want to strangle them every now and then. But they are yours. Always remember that no matter what anyone says, it’s ultimately your decision on how many kids you want to have. You can be a one and done or a the more the crazier…I mean merrier.
Let us know your number is the comments!