Recently, one of my friends posted a question on Facebook. They asked what non-political opinion do you have that is likely to be very unpopular. Want to take a guess on which opinion seemed to get the most likes- The person who hated Elf on the Shelf.
It wasn’t me, but I agree- it’s ridiculous.
What is Elf on the Shelf
For those of you living in a cave these past several years, let me bring you up to speed on this phenomenon known as Elf on the Shelf.
First, you drop $30 to get the book and a cheaply-made, ugly-looking elf.
The book tells the story of how the Elf is sent from the North Pole as one of Santa’s helpers. He’s there to keep an eye on all of the children and make sure they are behaving before Christmas.
Yep, there are rules that go along with the Elf on the Shelf. Two of them.
- Kids cannot touch the Elf, whatsoever, or it will lose its magic.
- The Elf can’t be move or speak when people are there.
WTF. So not only are we spinning these elaborate lies about Santa Claus to our kids, now we have expanded our web of deceit to include this stupid elf?
You have work to do
Oh, and you have a job you have to do as well. Every night, after your child goes to bed, you’re supposed to move the elf into some mischievous pose.
So, every night, people move the elf around, placing them in random spots. And you better not forget to do this at any time, because then you’ve created a whole bunch more work for yourself in having to make excuses for why it didn’t move.
It’s too much work. Really.
Frankly- this feels like an awful lot of extra work just to encourage your kids to be good for the final days leading up to Christmas.
No shortage of Elf Ideas
There are actually thousands of Pinterest boards with Elf On The Shelf ideas and poses for the non-creative parents to turn to.
Don’t let your friends out-do you on the Elf on the Shelf game. Do your research and play to win.
Not feeling like your Elf game is up to par? Pinterest has your back.
A short lifespan
According to my nine-year-old, all of the kids at school know it’s fake. He said he pretty much knew by kindergarten. But they don’t want to ruin the Christmas Spirit, so they all pretend it’s real.
So, basically, you’ve got a period from when they’re about three-years-old, to when they’re about four-years old, that Elf on the Shelf is effective. After that, they’re just faking it.
That’s a lot of extra work for the parents to try to remember to move the stupid thing every night, when it’s not even doing any good. You’re just wasting your time.
So, you want to stress yourself out by trying to remember to move the damn Elf every night, after already struggling to put your child or children to bed, be my guest.
If you want to have to explain how the cat or dog knocking the Elf over didn’t ruin Christmas to an upset preschooler, go right ahead.
And lastly, if you wish to annoy everyone on your Facebook friend list, go ahead and post what you did with your stupid Elf that night.
But count me out. I’m not buying into this Elf on the Shelf ridiculousness.